Book Review: From Strength to Strength
From Strength to Strength - Finding Success, Happiness, and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life by Arthur C.Brooks.
For those of you who don’t know, or forgot, I have had an interesting fitness journey to date and would identify as a fairly active person. I have previously competed in powerlifting, making it to the national level, and pride myself as someone who prioritizes his physical health. This book came as a recommendation from one of the fitness podcasts that I subscribe to regularly. I’d like to share with you all some of my takeaways from this book today.
Key Concepts
The book starts by going over different professions and when they reach their peak/middle trajectory. It was hard to read and not feel like I should be put out to pasture. It does, however, put quite a bit into perspective about various careers.
The book goes over the concept of having two different curves in your career.
The first one focuses on fluid intelligence with flexible thinking, problem solving and ability to reason. This is the start of your career. You’re more likely to bring new ideas and energy to the table. This curve flattens out mid 30s to early 40s.
The “second curve” is when you have an increase in what the author called crystallized intelligence. This is when it is more valuable to draw from your prior knowledge and experience. It works great for knowledge transfer and passing on wisdom.
The rest of the book is focused on getting you to accept that you can jump from the first curve to the second curve and it’s ok. It may seem scary and unfamiliar, but it’s worth it once you get settled.
He goes over the “strivers curse” and cites several examples of those who suffer from it. Strivers curse can be thought of as when high performers find it terrifying to think they have “peaked” in what they value the most. They find the thought of any sort of decline horrible and will do anything they can to stop it, including “grinding” harder and harder.
Specific Notes from the Book
Early career success doesn’t stop the strivers' curse. If you have chased money and power for much of your adult life, you likely will have a hard time transitioning to a world where you are not at your peak.
You can repurpose your professional life around the 2nd curve.
Trying to extend the 1st curve with sheer willpower will lead to disappointment. Instead, we should embrace the 2nd curve.
Devoting your time to the service of others instead of yourself is a good example of a way to embrace the second curve.
We need to kick the success addiction.
We really want to be special instead of happy. Many times, what we are chasing isn’t happiness but praise and admiration from others.
This point specifically resonated with me when looking at the world of social media.
The addiction to success dehumanizes you. You are not a complete person when you fixate on being perfect. Humans aren’t perfect.
This is true when you idolize someone for a specific reason like their status or success in one area of life. It can warp your perception of them, and you start to remove their humanity.
Many workaholics crave success, not the work.
But there is no end. There is never enough.
To a high performer who is struggling to accept the reality of their peak, they likely not only have a fear of failure but fear of a normal life.
Such is true for perfectionists. They may hold themselves to a higher standard than others and fear failing or just being “normal”.
Our definition of success today comes from accumulating more things (stuff, relationships, money, experiences, highlights, etc)
The satisfaction from such things is fleeting. Once we have something or have done something, we then want the next thing.
We also fear having “less” than someone else. This is another form of failure.
Strivers have a hard time focusing on eulogy virtues.
By focusing on your limited time, you can put a sense of scarcity on yourself. This will hone your focus on what you value the most.
High happiness is highly correlated to good physical health, good mental health, and high life satisfaction.
Low happiness is correlated with:
Smoking
Being overweight
Drinking
Not being honest
Not having stability in your life
Low education
Good relationships keep us happy and healthy
Loneliness is comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
These don’t have to be long term relationships to have a meaningful and fulfilling impact. .
Many are lonely at the top if they are not open and vulnerable.
Being vulnerable means you are not perfect and may go against what got you your success.
He mentions how hard it is for people over 40 to make new friends.
I can relate to this. I work from home, have a home gym and my hobbies mainly keep me in the house. It is not easy.
He talks about the importance of having close friends.
Work friends likely don’t count.
Real friends. Not friends you trade favors with or who you just talk about surface level things.
I like to think of this as “Move the body friends.” A friend that you can count to help you move a body. lol
You need to invest time in the relationship.
Just like anything, if you neglect it, then it will slowly decay.
Tips for making friends.
Allocate your time in advance.
You will likely never “catch up” or not be busy so plan well ahead of time.
Do your job as a friend.
Be a good friend. Be empathetic. Be an active listener.
Invest intelligently.
Think about who you care about the most and ask yourself if you are investing enough.
Focus on your intrinsic goals.
Remember who you were 5 or 10 years ago was likely very different and who you will be in 5 or 10 years will likely change as well.
Being vulnerable about your struggles can lift you up.
Exposure to the harder (or negative) emotions is healthy. It helps you handle them.
I personally don’t like to label the emotions as “good” or “bad”. They are all real and are part of the human experience.
We find community in our shared struggles.
A transition doesn’t have to be a crisis. Don’t overthink.
Closing Thoughts
I found the book helpful. It gave some interesting data points and strategies to navigate the transition to mid-life. I recommend this book if you are 35 or older and want an additional perspective to life and happiness.
Thanks for reading.
Dean